The World Without Mirrors: Confessions of a Peace Terrorist by Nick Bruechle

Author:Nick Bruechle [Bruechle, Nick]
Language: eng
Format: epub

15

Next level

If being a poorly skilled graffiti artist was a thrill, becoming a burglar and vandal was definitely next level. Breaking and entering is no misdemeanour, it’s a proper crime, and the consequences of being caught are much more serious than if you get busted with a spray can in your hand. So your heart rate is elevated long before it starts, and the adrenaline courses through your system in great waves. Only, they’re not waves: they’re like the successive surges of a tsunami, piling more and more on what’s already there so that you feel sick and inundated and suffocated. But you keep going because you have to, because suddenly you’re there and doing it before you know it, and the only way out of it is to finish. It’s frightening and inspiring, knowing that no one can stop you, unless they do stop you and then it will be the last time you’re ever free, so you feel freer than you ever have before.

Afterwards, the release is intense. Your limbs are jelly and your mind is bursting and your heart is bursting too, and your eyes are like scimitars, knifing through the darkness trying to discern any threat and searching in vain for the audience you wish you had but know you can’t have. It’s a rush that beat any drug or any feeling I’d ever had before, and would only be exceeded later when things got even crazier.

I won’t bother to catalogue all our crimes in this phase; we have a prosecution team for that. But the first major felony, like so many other firsts in your life, is a signal moment: a memory seared by fear and the density of the rage that rises in you when you’re engaged in destruction, an inescapable turning point in your story. So I’ll tell you about that.

Of course, the target had to be PIVOT. Although we’d consciously expanded our sphere of interest to include the other wars, battles, skirmishes, invasions and incursions that are regrettably still being started or carried on by this formerly great country of ours, averting the invasion of Venezuela on the spurious grounds advanced by PIVOT was still at the top of our list. Theirs was a plan to instigate a whole new batch of war crimes – to pile up a fresh new mountain of corpses – and it was getting closer to happening every day.

The media was compliantly pushing all sorts of wild accusations about the Venezuelan government, repeating allegations that will be treated as laughably transparent bullshit by historians but were made with apparent sincerity by those whose job it was to act shocked and plot an invasive response. The idea that ‘we’ could protect people by dropping bombs on them had not lost any currency, in spite of the disastrous outcomes of similar misadventures in Libya, Iraq, Syria, Somalia, Cuba and so many others it was impossible to remember them all.

The trouble with attacking PIVOT was, and still is, that it’s impossible.

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